“What used to be a smooth piece of granite that would bend the first half-dozen steroid needles I stuck into it, now looked as if someone had given me an ass-kicking while wearing a pair of spiked golf shoes”

Had I known, I would have added” “…the closest I’d ever get to anything ‘golf,’ as that ‘game’ is only for fags who are too pussy to beat each other up in the name of sport like real men.”